There Goes My Life || Self Para

All she could think about was 
'I'm too young for this.
Got my whole life ahead. 
Hell I'm just a kid myself. 
How'm I gonna raise one?'

She didn’t want to know the answer. Kiara realized that as she was waiting for the little stick in her hand to say something, anything. She had a hunch that she already knew what was coming, and that that tiny contraption would light up any second with that word she was scared to death to read. But still she waited. Still she sought out that confirmation (or possibly denial) that she needed so badly.

Not exactly glamorous, Kiara had decided to wait until she was nowhere near Zayn or anyone else before she tested. Which was what had led the spritely girl to sitting in a sink in a one room bathroom in a gas station that looked like it would fall down any second. Naturally, she couldn’t get time alone entirely, but it was a little more quiet than the bus or a hotel room where people walked in and out all night long. Kicking her feet like a small child as she looked to the screen, Kiara let out a groan of impatience when she noticed the screen had yet to illuminate.

A knock at the door and a call from Luna to hurry up let her know that it was getting closer to time to go back to the hotel she’d been staying at with Zayn and a few others while the boys enjoyed their week off. “I’ll be out in a minute!” She called back in response, still perched at her spot in the little sink that she was sure wasn’t meant to hold her weight at all - as little as that amount of weight may have been. She looked from the little stick in her hand to her phone that she had rested on the back of the toilet. Three minutes had never seemed so long before this, and all she wanted was for that little screen to let her know if her hunch was right or not.

There it was. The screen changed, Kiara noticed that from the corner of her eye and for once in her life, Kiara was scared to death to see what it said. She couldn’t remember being scared of anything like this before. Not when she faced her own potential death straight in the face, when she fought for Sonny’s life, not even when she’d killed and been worried about being caught. Nothing in her life had ever seemed as important as finding out what that little screen said. 

After a long moment of deliberation, she turned to look at it. The verdict nearly screaming in her face as that one word made tears fill her eyes. She could feel her stomach tying in knots as she realized what that one word really meant. How much she would have to change. The plastic test fell to the floor as her hand shook and her face buried into her knees to let the tears fall.

This was it. She would do what her and Zayn had already talked about and head back to LA to wait out the rest of the tour and figure things out with people that knew what they were talking about when it came to furies. She could see it already, she would undoubtedly spend her time holed up in her bed crying about how she’s not ready for this, even if somewhere deep inside of her she was excited for this future. 

But first and foremost, before any plans to leave were made… Kiara needed a friend. She pulled her head up and lifted herself out of the sink so she could grab her jacket off the back of the door and go to meet up with the others. 

That little stick stayed right where she had dropped it and she had no intention of going back for it or for that little word that she was still undecided whether it had ruined her life or not. 

Pregnant.